posture.

speech.

physical wellness.

mental wellness.

i am my own best friend.

all i think of is fried green tomatoes and ketchup.

i won’t run away. i love me.

fuck you all and every one.

knowledge is power. power corrupts. looking at those intelligent-full i see anxiety. i see worry. i see unease. best to limit knowledge- lest we judge, hate…

my windows and doors opportunities are so slim, i can take no note of them. even that is too much energy expended.

cathy and i bonded over this earlier today. i don’t remember times, names, many events…..

true love is self love.

i am a fool.

i make so many judgments on me and am more critical and all-consumed by my self than you could ever hope to guess at….or that i would ever let on.

we must DO some thing, right? at times, all there is to do is assume….and so……we DO!

it is strange that we feign being so close when we are soooooo far and could never hope to get close to another.

i need to remember to lie to myself. for comfort’s sake. this is why folks are alcoholics. point your finger on the S/N axis.

Robert Smith says:

sit down kiddies, and i’ll regale you with stories of my youth…..*ahem*

when i look out my kitchen window, i see people laying in the grass, riding bikes, playing with their children, running, walking their dogs. i love this house. i love love this house. i am the luckiest person on the planet. i want to look out the window more.

cooking with Quan Yin.

those who meet me in the context of my family wonder where i came from. my mother asks me where i came from. i don’t know what to say, but i understand why they ask.

i am extremely restless. i want to find people like me- the problem is that i think they’re all in hiding.

my car gets 25mpg. i have applied for food stamps. i feel listless, worn down, broken, tired. i am quieted and unfocused. the garden is lovely and thriving. borage leaves DO taste of cucumber.

any one can do any thing good.

only an other artist.

homogeneity has no place in modern society. spit it out! smear dirt on your face if you fucking have to.

i am desperately seeking this balance of party every night getitoutofyoursystembeforeyougettoyour30s,40s,andhaveamidlifecrisis and monogamy. you know, this could be solved by physical sex with self and spiritus sex with other(s). i know! i looked in the mind’s eye mirror last evening on way to garden singing Prince’s “Kiss” to Brianne. i love her.

gentlemen, your wife’s sleep is more important than yours. happy wife = happy life. sacrifice any thing you have to. if she is not ok, you’re not going to be. it can be that simple.

i do not care for ego flavor. thanks.

one day i won’t have to do so many things the hard way. the only way to reach that day is to grow old, i know.

think about all the boys who’ve died because of what the president eats for breakfast. life is so fucking holy, eh?

so much binging- now, THE purge. beware the deluge. good thing Durham has so many trees to climb up in, yeah?

i don’t think you understand Bodhisatva. enlightenment does not imply ‘disappearing’ in any fashion. i had a whole conversation about cthulhu with you last night, did you catch that?

jesus, king idealist. but then who is the pineapple sage?!

i am constructing my own. to accept.

“sing a simple melody//that’s how easy love can be”

i love yooooou!

peace in alone ness. chocolate medicine…..i am overwhelmingling inspired….there is no way to serve you proper justice, folks. you are so beautiful in moments.

i am ignorant of my self in many ways still, of course. work now, rest later. in a very BROAD and GRAND sense.

he sat there holding my diseased hand with his head turned, sobbing. i don’t know if you have a real grasp on relativity. it is hard to answer ‘yes’ ‘no’ often….contextually, umm…maybe?

negative reinforcement in many many situations, like a dog. we can all dance together i say, just uh at arm’s length. too far, too close.

some people are more sensitive than you. try to understand. people connected, in reality, in practice is so different. there is too much discussion of ideas…

every room is the dance room. every place a dance place. four walls around dancing. this is dancing.

i would like to wave goodbye to so much sugar. with me?

small doses for introverts, larger for extroverts. ? i need so much time for daydreams….i don’t know how else to explain. i am forgetting how to spell…something is pushing that out the back window. ha!

oh, those ectomorphs.

i love you brianne.

you, thee most romantic of all. you put my ass to sh sha sha shaaaame.

no more hand shakes. only hugs.

i dreamt i was trying to explain my love for stereo total to some foreigners. the overall theme was ‘giving’.